There is No Other Shoe

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Truth Byte #6: It’s only too good to be true because you keep jinxing it.

In in modern times, many of us have replaced traditional religious frameworks with a new system of understanding our life events: the game of chance. We turned away from a belief in rewards and punishments doled out from some entity in the sky, and have started believing instead in a casino model of life. And this model also has certain rules. We say things like: “You are so lucky!” and “Just my luck” and “I guess his luck ran out”. We have these strange superstitions like “Bad things come in threes” and “It’s just a matter of time until (fill in your bad event here)”.  And many of us, when things are going well, find ourselves waiting for the other shoe to drop.

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Buyer Beware: You can’t do this alone.

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Truth Byte #5: If you want to navigate your inner landscape, you need a compass.

How do you measure the success of your relationships? Is it by how many likes or followers you have on a particular social media site? Is it how many missed calls you have when you turn your phone on silent at the movies? Is it how many people light up when they see you? Is it how many times a week your mother tries to reach you? It is hard to know how to measure whether or not we are succeeding in human relationships. It is even harder to know if we have weeded the garden of our inner space.

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Admit it’s broken, and let me fix it.

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Truth Byte #4: You probably do need help after all.

I am tired of people telling me they are fine when they are so clearly NOT fine. Your marriage is breaking apart at the seams. That equals not fine. You are grumpy when you leave for work, and grumpy after you come home. That equals not fine. The only time you can relax is after you have had a drink or two, and only if it’s a long weekend. That equals not fine. We are a nation of unhappy people masquerading as “fine”. And I am here to call bullshit.

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Throwing Up through Christmas

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Truth Byte #3: “Just stop talking.”

This was a busy few weeks. Unlike most years at Christmas time, I was organized, ready, and calm, and everything was on schedule and running smoothly. Until the vomiting started.

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Baking the Cake of my Life

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Truth Byte #2: “When you are ready, you will start.”

I have spent years feeling bad about not starting.  I finally finished my Ph.D. and it was time to hang up my shingle and get to work.  I had all the resources, all the book knowledge, all the cheerleaders I needed, but something just wasn’t working.  My business wasn’t launching the way I knew it could.  I have been reflecting over the last year why it took me so long to really get started.  What I realized was really quite simple and equally profound: I wasn’t ready.

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My Personal Sunset in the Garage

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Truth Byte #1: “Let the relationship define the moment rather than the moment define the relationship.”

This morning, I was angry. At everyone. But mostly at myself. I knew I should have gone to bed earlier, and I woke up cranky with a full day ahead of me. I rushed around, getting the kids bathed and fed and out the door, only to remember as we were getting into the car that it was pyjama day at my son’s school.

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Are you ready to start something new? I am!

Sometimes, I just don’t start. I have many good reasons for not starting such as:

  1. My plan is not fully in place
  2. I have not considered contingencies
  3. The people I want to partner with are too busy
  4. The timing sucks
  5. The little one is scribbling on a floor mat and it interrupted my brainstorm

I just make lists and lists of all the reasons I should wait for a “better” time to start my projects. Well, today I know that waiting is a cop-out.

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Healing Relationships

You are a naturally social creature. But you are also a private being that needs time alone to reflect and re-charge. You will have a personal balance point of how much you want to be around others and how much alone-time you need. But whether you are a social butterfly or a wall-flower, how you interact with the people around you tells you something important about your belief system.


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